Meghna Pant’s column – Law against marital rape is necessary, but be cautious | मेघना पंत का कॉलम: मैरिटल रेप के विरुद्ध कानून जरूरी है, पर ऐहतियात रखें

Meghna Pant, award-winning author, journalist and speaker

The conflict between feminists and MRAs (Men’s Rights Activists) is not only due to the conflict of ideologies but also due to the lack of proper laws. Nothing highlights this more than the issue of marital rape in India.

Marital rape is a reality. The wife may be sexually abused by her husband. Does marriage mean complete and unconditional consent? No. And ‘no’ always means ‘no’. Marriage is not a contract for sex. Women are not the chattels of their husbands, but are equal free persons under the law.

This is the reason why forced physical relations come under the category of rape. They violate the principle of consent. Will marital rape law cause disintegration in families? No. On the contrary, families are broken by abuse, not by laws.

Then what is the reason why the government is terming the criminalization of marital rape as ‘extremely harsh’? This is because our laws are not gender-neutral. No one can deny that power dynamics are inherently stacked against women, thanks to thousands of years of patriarchy.

When women face violence at the hands of men, they fight back. But a handful of women have taken it too far by misusing the laws meant for their protection.

These 1% of women are hurting the other 99%. Due to legal blackmailing and false cases by these 1% women, laws like marital rape have unfortunately come to be considered a privilege that women have now lost.

Feminists believe that if laws are made gender-neutral, men will abuse them. At the same time, activists working for men’s rights believe that if laws are made for the protection of women, then women will misuse them. Both are right in their own way.

This is why violence and abuse should be considered an issue for everyone, not just women. Biased interpretation of laws (such as dowry or domestic violence laws) should be eliminated. Laws require safeguards to ensure that allegations are not used to settle personal scores.

The lack of legal recognition of male-victims in abuse cases must end. Men should not be unfairly targeted or considered guilty without sufficient evidence. Due process and the legal system should protect women and men from wrongful allegations. Rather than pitting one gender against another, our goal should be fairness, preventing abuse of laws, and advocating for gender-neutral security.

Unless the laws are equal – that yes, women can also cheat, make false allegations, commit violence – the people of our country cannot be equal. It is true that women suffer more than men – but this cannot be an argument against equal laws.

There are only 36 countries in the world which do not consider marital rape as a crime, and India is one of them. This doesn’t help India’s already infamous reputation as the rape capital of the world. What can we do to move forward in this? Document everything. Take screenshots of erroneous messages.

Record audio or video of inappropriate conversations. Install CCTV. Be it sexual harassment or marital rape, you have to make your case strong. If there is evidence, you will have a chance to fight for justice. Don’t forget that sexual violence already comes under domestic violence.

Remember, men and women are not enemies of each other. Both men and women are fighting against patriarchy, which is unfair to both men and women. We should fight for this, if we fight together we will become stronger. (These are the author’s own views)